The Melon Heads of Southwest Michigan
The Mothman of West Virginia, The Lizard people of LA, and Scotland’s Lochness Monster are all creatures that haunt our world. But did you know that Southwest Michigan is home to our very own cryptid? In fact, there may be an entire community of creatures living in the woods around St. Joe. What are these creatures? The Melon Heads of Southwest Michigan. Given the season, fellow Wind-Up media team member Ben Williams and I have decided to investigate the large-headed monsters and hunt them down in order to prove their existence.
What is a melon head? Melonheads are a feral humanoid species with gigantic deformed heads. It is unclear what specifically caused their misshapen skulls but is believed to be the result of radiation from either the multiple nuclear powerplants nearby or an experiment gone wrong at the junction asylum. Ben and I needed to figure out which of these stories is more likely to be true before we could seek out the melon heads. So we interviewed the supposed founder of the southwest Michigan cryptid society and St. Joseph High Schools’ very own Art teacher: Mr. Culver.
When Ben and I initially asked for his help deciphering the truth behind the legends he was reluctant: “What’s a melon head?” Mr. Culver said. However, we saw through his ruse, and like true journalists pushed further and broke him. Culver proceeded to explain that it is likely a combination of the two stories: “Doctors from the asylum were conducting tests on the effects of nuclear radiation on their patients. The patients’ heads grew to almost three times the size of an average human granting them telekinetic abilities. They then used their newfound powers to overthrow the doctors turning the asylum into the official “melon head hideout.” No one has tried to reclaim the building because frankly, it’s at least a 13-minute drive from the nearest town and “Isn’t worth the hike” according to local law enforcement. Also, melon heads are spooky-looking.” Said, Culver. This was exactly the kind of insight we were looking for, but we still needed to figure out the best place to catch a melon head.
Continuing our investigation, Ben and I released a question in the Wind-Up survey asking if students were familiar with the melon head legend and if so have they seen one. Despite a large amount of “no” responses, there were a few students that recommended we should check out a tunnel in a wealthy neighborhood around Stevensville. Despite not knowing how trustworthy this tip was, we decided it was worth looking into, given that melon heads are obviously nocturnal and probably like tunnels. Because moles are nocturnal and they like tunnels. So, with a half-decent lead, We prepared for our adventure.
Ben and I gathered our equipment: A net, a whistle, headlamps, Camouflage clothing, an assortment of melons to show we are friendly, a corkscrew, The Bible, a copy of Moby Dick, number two pencils (NOT MECHANICAL), and snacks. We were officially on the hunt. The rest of our expedition is documented via video. To see if Ben and I made contact with a melon head and possibly gained telekinetic superpowers, visit the Wind-Up website.